Stressed

[Apologies in advance for the rant.]

I'm stressed and I'm not quite sure why...it may be one of those multiple-sources building up things.

G told me that a friend of his/ours -- a friend from G's former workplace and his girlfriend, who have invited us to a couple of their theme parties -- wanted an answer on whether we wanted to go to an A's game with them on a particular Saturday in August. Ever since I spent some years singing anthems for various events with the Cisco Singers, then 'retired' from the anthem part, I've had a bit of a dislike for going to big baseball games. I'll go to an occasional (once a season?) San Jose Giants game down the street with friends because it's down the street and quick, but going to SF or Oakland for a game seems like a gigantic timesink to me, with little reward. I know, intellectually, that the reward should be the time I spend with the friends, not the game, but -- this particular couple's crowd is sort of, but not quite, our crowd. They're younger and more reckless than I am, and I can't help but feel like they went down a list of friends for this and nobody else could go, and they finally got to us. So I said no. But it's not a very confident no. Maybe I should go because it's a social thing to do? I don't get out of the house that much for social stuff; my hockey friends see each other at games and for the most part don't seem the invite-y kind. Or I just don't get invited, which I realize is also sometimes the case, in seeing cheerful reports of events hosted by friends going by. Sometimes I feel like inviting a bunch of people to go to a movie, but I tried that once, and everybody was either busy, or a 'maybe' but didn't make it.

I could also be stressed because my work computer had a serious software failure yesterday, and I took it into the company fixit center this morning, didn't get the "it's ready" callback until closing time, and I have no idea what meetings I have tomorrow, or whether I missed any today.

Or it could be because Jeeves peed inappropriately twice in the past week or so, and he only did it because something stressed him out inside his tummy, I'm afraid that we won't know if he has done it again because it doesn't stink like poop does. As it is, we have to change their diet from the nice easy-to-maintain dry food in a timer box to being mostly wet food (to increase water intake), which means they're going to be waking us up tomorrow morning between 8am and 9am and I'll have to get up and prepare some wet food. And then go get my computer, I guess. It's already past 1am.

Or it could be because I'm starting a 12 hour fast for a glucose panel, which is among some other tests that my new gynecologist wants me to take because I haven't had them taken in a long time. It makes sense to check and have a baseline, but what if something is positive?

And it could be because I hate getting weighed by my gynecologist every year.

Or it could also be all the celebrities dying this past week.

Or it could be my uncle in England who is very sick and in the hospital. I found that out today. My aunt and I have become very close over the past few years, and I can hardly imagine how she feels right now, and so far away. I wish I could be there. Thank you, cousin Jesse, for staying with her for the duration for us.

Or it could be because G is stressed, which tends to make me stressed by proxy.

Heck, I'm even stressed about whether my parents will like my sister's new boyfriend; they will have met him today for the first time. My parents are hosting them for a couple of days. L doesn't always get along with them, but she adores the new boy so much, and it was such a big step for her to be willing to trust someone that much, that I can't help but hope that everything works out ok for her. I know she'd be devastated if my parents decided that he was just another choice that they wouldn't have made and write him off. Crossing my fingers.

Oh, and we're having a visitor stay with us this weekend -- a college roommate of G's, here on a business trip. I suppose I should consider it a welcome distraction from thoughts of all of the above.

Some people stay up late to try to delay the arrival of stressful things. I think that enough of them are already here that I'm going to go to bed to try to make it go by faster. G'night.